Fire to Ashes
by ILoveLucy908
Summary: If there's one thing that still hasn't been eaten by Rachel's life sucking cancer it's her "Cant go down without a fight" attitude. Hopefully it wont be whisked away from her, maybe if it does a prince can come and rescue. But that's stupid, nobody's has laid eyes on her since her massive faint spell in sophomore year. AU Finchel
1. Chapter 1: Ashes

**I do not own Glee or any of its characters. Its all Ryan Murphy and all the other amazing people who made it.**

 **I know this is a short chapter, but just bare with me. It's only the first one. Enjoy!**

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Rachel hates it when people worry about her. She should probably get used to it, since people haven't stopped worrying about her since she was sixteen years old. Still it was highly annoying to say the least (she doesn't have the patience to think of something more fitting). Her fathers she can understand; they worry whenever she sneezes since as long as she can remember, her doctors on the other hand shouldn't be worrying at all. She has been a highly sick and frustrated girl for a while now, so they shouldn't be surprised by her outbursts.

She's Rachel Berry. Destined for greatness, no need to worry about her, no not at all. Well, now she doesn't really believe anymore that she's destined for greatness. More like destined to a hospital bed, forever to be in holy whatever God decided, until the day she dies. Her father's especially worry about her the most when she says these type of things to their faces. She used to hope that maybe by some miracle she can get better and be able to be the Broadway babe she imagined herself to be. She started losing hope around when she was eighteen, and now at the ripe age of twenty-one it's all locked in a vault somewhere up her rectum for all she cares. There are moments where she swears she can hear the old Rachel Berry kicking and screaming throwing a tantrum saying "YOU CAN"T GIVE UP YOUR DREAMS" , she responds with a "Watch me". It was decided a long time ago that all she would focus on is not killing her self because of boredom. Never would Rachel have guessed that she would be so sarcastic and contemptuous in her life. Maybe suffering through chemotherapy and living in a hospital does that to you.

Yes the Rachel Barbra Berry has cancer. Acute myeloid leukemia, as her doctors would prefer to say. She doesn't know exactly how it happened or any specific details, but she does remember the pain. There was a lot of pain. Pain because she could see Broadway flying away with its big bright lights and stage. Pain because she was starving, just the thought of eating made her want to throw up. Pain because there were nights of shivering and sweating, and dosing herself in pain medication that didn't work at all except get her on the brink of overdosing. Pain because she can see her future children dying, her husband along with them; family, friends, all gone.

When the doctors told her she had cancer she was on a feeding tube and she she felt like pulling it out and shoving it up their noses. She was angry, it was unacceptable and certainly unfair. She fought with them, telling them they are lying, they are devils sent from hell. They sedated her when she started to take out her IV. She couldn't believe it until the charts were right in front of her eyes. As much as Rachel has been made fun of over the years about it, there was no denying that Rachel Berry loved facts. And the facts were right there, and the grief started growing bigger than her nose. She started sobbing as much as she'd hate to admit.

Her fathers were uncontrollable, when they found out. The doctors told her first idiotically(who trained these people?!) while they were out getting coffee. Imagine their surprise to walk into their daughters room to find her screaming like a banshee at them. After they sedated her they told them, she woke up to sobbing and unrecognizable words coming out of their mouths. She came in because of a high fever, they thought she had an eating disorder. They were apologizing, because a few days before they were disappointed on how she was treating her body, and how she was throwing her future away because she thinks she's not pretty enough. She tried to explain that she just couldn't eat, it sickened her; it wasn't until she fainted when they brought her to the hospital.

She's been going through chemo for years. There was a point when she was nineteen that her cancer slowly deteriorated, and they thought it was going to be gone for good. Then it came back in full force the day after she was discharged from the hospital. Funny how things work out. So she went back on chemo, because what else can she do. Twiddle her thumbs?

"Rachel. You know you can't throw spoons at doctors right. They are going to cuff you." Her favorite nurse Jamie said to her, snapping her out of her thought.

Jamie has been with her since she was diagnosed with cancer, sticking by her through everything. All the other nurses hate her, because of her diva like attitude, but Jamie likes it. Jamie also doesn't deal with all her unnecessary fits, and sets her straight.

Rachel rolled her eyes, thinking about the moment, "I know, but they were all being fools telling me for the umpteenth time how my treatments been going."

"It's what they do. Really they think they are Gods walking on Earth, don't mind them" Jamie checks her vitals while saying this.

"Your vitals look good and it's o'clock. So I think you can go, visit him"

Rachel immediately cheered up, its time. She hops out of the bed and starts walking out with her IV.

"Hey don't run off let me grab you a wheelchair, so it can seem your not making your big escape." Jamie goes out of the room and comes back with a wheel chair at hand. Rachel jumps on, and taps her foot anxiously.

Jamie starts pushing her across the floor, and as planned Rachel puts on an unamused face, for people to see she thinks she's off to some test or something uninteresting. As they pass by a stack of magazines on a coffee table, Rachel reaches out and grabs them. She puts them below her as they continue on their way. When they finally reach the room, Jamie squeezes her shoulder before opening the door. She pushes Rachel in before closing the door behind her.

"Hey! Were you able to get Vogue?" Kurt squeals.

Rachel grind and pulls them out from underneath, "Of course I would. Wouldn't leave you hanging"

They laugh, as Kurt moves over and pats next to him gesturing for her to come and sit with him. She stands up and lays next to him and they start flipping through the issue together. He wistfully sighs every so often at the pages, Rachel losing interest sometimes. Fashion was never really her fore front. When they finish the issue, Kurt puts it down and gets ready for the weekly conversations.

"So how's the wonderful world of chemo." Kurt arches his eyebrow, knowing whats to come.

"How do you think?" Rachel pulls off her beanie to show her head with only a little fuzz of hair on it, "Do I look stylish?"

"Not the fall trend, but you're making it work. I do miss your long silly hair though" Kurt sighs dreamily, "Let's have a moment of silence for what we have loss"

They stay in silence for a few moments holding hands, their laughter threatening to come out. When it does Rachel felt as if she burst some organ or something. She laughed so hard it hurt and it was hard to breath. When they've calmed down the room turned serious.

"How about your heart?"

Kurt looked down for a moment, frowning at his chest, "It's fine, they are still monitoring me closely. Hopefully I can move up the list. They say that I'm really close to getting a new heart, but…."

"They have been saying that for the last five months. I know, and it's such a terrible situation."

Kurt has been in and out of this hospital since they were both nineteen. Rachel met him in the waiting room of the hospital on one of her good days. He was bouncing his leg up and down as his father Burt smoothed out his pants several times. She noticed he was listening to Barbra Streisand, the woman she looks up to the most, and commented on it. They immediately bonded over their love of Broadway. The thing with Kurt was that he needed a new heart. His was weak from birth, but the doctors thought they fixed it. They didn't. It has been growing worse over the years, and it wasn't until Kurt passed out while dancing, was when they rushed him to the hospital. Burt has had two heart attacks himself before Kurt fainted, so the problem was genetic. Kurt was so focused on taking good care of his dad that he didn't take care of himself. The doctors say it's better to deal with this now when he's young then when he's older.

Kurt has been on the transplant for a while now. His last two hearts went to s patients who got bumped up the list. Rachel has been through it all with him, sticking by his side. He's the only real friend she's ever had. Nobody wants to be friends with the bratty cancer girl, everybody but him. He knew how it felt. To be judged and pitied. Before she got sick she was constantly bullied, Kurt was bullied too because of his sexuality. They needed each other, and will stick by each other until the end.

"Tell me something good."

"If they let me grow out my hair, I can be Ellen DeGeneres. I don't really suit Eminem." Rachel looks at him half-heartedly.

He gives out a chuckle and rubs his forehead. She knows he hates talking about hearts, makes his head hurt with all of it. Rachel started to look through a past issue by Kurt's end table. Suddenly Kurt pats her knee several times, to get her attention.

"You know my dad found someone."

Rachel peeked up from the issue, intrigued. She doesn't see how Burt would have been able to find someone here, when he's not working or sleeping at the house, he's here in the hospital. She can't see how he would have time to find someone.

"Is that so?"

"Yep! He met her in the hospital, he gets coffee with her time to time. She has a kid here in the hospital."

It's strange, imagining Burt with someone other than himself or Kurt. The fact that he's with someone is surprising. Though having a kid here in the floor would be strange. Two sick kids together.

"Are you okay with this?" Kurt stares at the wall for a little while, thinking about the question. It's obvious he's thought about this way before she's brought it up.

"Yeah, I guess. He's my dad, and I would always want him to stay with mom and not forget her. But I'm not stupid, I would be lonely if I was alone with a sick kid. He doesn't have a social life, I'm his life. And I love him, but I'm twenty-one I'm a grown up now. He needs some company."

"Aww look at you, with your wisdom and knowledge! Very mature response. If I were you I'd be stubborn as a mule." Rachel responded with a small smile

"That's only because you are the diva of the family." Just as he says that, Jamie walks in and gestures for her to leave.

Rachel sighs, hugging Kurt goodbye promising to visit next week. She hops on the wheelchair and waved goodbye as Jamie pushes her along. She looks into the rooms to see a variety of people. They are all of different size, color, age, but the thing that's all the same is they are sick. Very sick. She see's nurses filling out files and reports, doctors half asleep and on their fifth cup of coffee. Once they reach her room, Jamie helps her out of the wheel chair and on to the bed. Rachel sighs and stares outside, she wonders if she will ever be able to leave the hospital.

Jamie noticing where she's staring says, "If you stay on good behavior they will let you outside, and not have a watch guard on you all the time. That means no spoon throwing."

Rachel nods, as Jamie walks out with one final glance towards her direction. If the old Rachel Berry was out and about she would have talked nonsense on what she'd do with her outside time. Well if the old Rachel Berry WAS out she wouldn't need to be excited about going outside because she wouldn't have been banned from it.

* * *

Alright she may be sick and a little frustrated, but Rachel is not insane. She told this to her therapist several times. She does so whenever he says something that suggests her mental stability. Really its HIM that would be most likely to be crazy.

"Rachel you have to stop throwing utensils at your doctors when they say something you do not like" Dr. Edwards said calmly, though she can just tell that he thinks she is probably going to blow any minute, "You are not a little girl anymore, you cannot go around throwing little tantrums when you feel like it."

"Sir, with your out most respect, these doctors have memory loss. They keep on coming in to my room telling me the exact same thing over and over again. It gets quite irritating." Rachel crosses her leg over the other while adjusting her hat.

"It gets quite irritating having to handle your tantrums every other session, Rachel"

Oh now it's really obvious his dislike for her. She can feel it pouring out of him; she wouldn't be wrong about these things, dealing with people hating her since primary school.

"You know Rachel I feel like this isn't working out."

Yes! Finally, they will send her a decent therapist who actually knows how to do their job correctly.

"So I'm going to recommend a support group or more like prescribe it."

Crap. Rachel isn't one to curse, but this is an acceptable situation. She'll be stuck with all those depressing cancer kids, who share way too much on the first session. "You are not suggesting that I am depressed or anything in that manner are you?"

"No I do not think you are depressed. I just believe that you need support from people who truly know your situation." Dr. Edwards closes his notebook and sets down his glasses

"But Dr- "

"Dr. nothing. This is final. I hope you find what you need,"

With that Dr. Edwards stands up and open the door to his office. She stands up and leaves, Jamie there with a wheel chair. She brushes her off and walks to her room without waiting for her.

All Rachel, knows is that she's in a terrible predicament. Nothing she can do, but behave well and wait until they say she is emotionally stable. This doesn't mean Rachel won't try to get out of it. If there's one thing she can still do it is not go down without a fight.

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 **Hi! This is my first story here on this website, and I'm kinda nervous about it. I had this idea while watching Grey's Anatomy, and my friend sent me a picture of Finn and Rachel, and all kinda clicked in my head. I did read up on leukemia so don't think I'm walking into this blind. Though I still don't know about it that well, I at least got the base down. I really do hope you enjoy this story. I'm out.**

 **Adios Tannerinos.**


	2. Chapter 2: I Don't See No One But You

**I do not own Glee in anyway possible (But wouldn't it be cool if I did?) .**

 **The chapter title is from Neyo's One Million Girl.**

 **Hope you like! :)**

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Rachel flips through the photo album, until she turns to a specific photo. It was her in front of the Lima Bean, this small café that she used to go to a lot where she used to live, and her friend Sunny was laughing by the side. It was Rachel's sweep of the place. She wanted to got every spot in Lima to remember it. In that time the only place Rachel would agree to move too was New York City, and the fact that her parents left Lima for Columbus kinda sucked. For a 5th grader it was a pretty big deal.

She wonders what Sunshine was doing right now, they never really kept in touch after she moved. Sunshine was probably off as a Broadway legend or something. Rachel hasn't been caught up in Broadway for a while. Rachel remembers that it was with Sunshine that she decided she was going to be a star. They were watching some irrelevant TV show and when it ended Funny Girl started playing. That's how it happened. After that she and Sunshine decided they'd be the next Broadway legends ever. Sunshine wasn't as committed as her of course, not really delving into school plays.

Rachel sighs and puts down the album and looks out the window. She pushed the button for a nurse, hopefully not sounding any alarms. Today was the day she would start therapy, and she wasn't that excited. Maybe the nurse would take pity on her and take her around the hospital and forget she needs to go to a therapy session. It is also unfortunate luck that she would be starting another round of chemo the next day.

When she hears the door open she looks over to see Jamie there with an annoyed look.

"Rachel, I know what you paged me for. I can't let you skip this." Jamie closes the door behind her and goes the small closet in her room. She pulls out one of the few wigs she owns. Rachel always puts one on when she's in a good mood. "Here put this on. Maybe you'll gain some confidence."

Rachel stared at the terrible thing. It reminds her of the things she's lost, and that it's hopeless to try and get it back. But then she see's Jamie's face and how tired she looks. Rachel sighs and grabs the wig, putting it on. Jamie comes over to help her adjust it. Backing up, Jamie smiled and hands her, her phone camera to see herself.

She looks like how she used to look, just with a few differences. Her wig went to her shoulder and was a dark chocolate color with caramel highlights. It was a bit different from her natural hair color, but she liked it a lot. She fiddled with the bangs until they looked nice. You couldn't tell that she was bald underneath, unless you already knew before.

"Come on. It's going to start in ten minutes, we have to go up a floor." Jamie helped her up and guided her out.

There's a 99.9% chance that she's going to hate this.

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Rachel stands outside the room, twirling her hair in between her fingers. She has been standing outside it for five minutes, after Jamie left. In two minutes it will start, and she knows if she tried to escape they already got five guards each with their own shot of drugs to give her, to take her down, ready in hand. God she hated the psychiatric ward, they had more security than the Pentagon. Rachel smoothed down her hospital gown and opened the door.

The room was spacious and large. Against the wall there were pastries, drinks, and a coffee machine. Some people were mingling, and some were sitting down already. Almost all of them were wearing hospital gowns and with IVs connected to them, like her. There were only three people with regular clothing.

Knowing that if she stays standing any longer someone might want to talk to her, she sits down in a seat with no one next to her at the moment. She also knows if she stayed longer her legs would have given up on her .Rachel knows that eventually someone's going to sit next to her, but she'd rather just stay where she is.

"Hey, what's your crime?" She looks over to see a curly haired man sitting next to her. He was giving her a small smile and looked around for a moment before saying again, "Most people are here because they were forced to. Like me."

"I kept on throwing utensils at my doctors, and my therapist got fed up with me. Sent me up here to this… place." He raises his eyebrows in amusement.

"My names Rachel. Rachel Barbra Berry" she shoots her hand out, open in expectation. He shakes her hand and says,

"My names Blaine Anderson. Nice to meet you." Blaine looks around again, his leg jumping up and down. She noticed how he was wearing jeans, a button down shirt, and a bow tie. His hair was all over the place, like his leg. "So do you think you can go through this session without throwing utensils at me?"

She laughs and notices how his leg was going faster and how he was wringing his hands continuously.

"Are you okay? Is there a mass murder about to enter the room in any second and I am left un-knowingly?" Blaine shakes his head and gives her an amused smile.

"No it's just, I don't like presenting in front of people. Stage fright I guess" He looks around once again, and sets his eyes on an overweight man , whose giving out glares at everyone. Blaine shudders and turns away before turning back to her, "I'm imagining the people that make me nervous, naked. He wasn't a pretty sight to see."

She could see why. The man was dirty all over and you could see a rash coming in. She looks over to Blaine, with him cringing.

"He should take a shower. I personally think personal hygiene is very important. I have a nightly routine and everything." Blaine nods in agreement, opening his mouth to speak. A woman walks in before he can say anything, clapping her hands and giving a big smile.

"Alright! Everybody sit down, we are about to begin." Everybody sits down while she goes over to the table and put on some hand sanitizer. She sits down in the only empty seat in the circle and smiles at the people around her. "I'm so glad to start are very first session today with all of you! This is a safe environment, you can say your thoughts, and not be worried."

Blaine nudges Rachel and rolls his eyes over to the woman when she look at him. It makes Rachel smile, knowing he finds the whole situation as stupid as she does.

"Let's start! We all go around the room and say our name, age, and diagnosis! I'll start!" She stands up and looks around the room "My name is Emma Pillsbury I'm 32 years old and I was diagnosed with OCD five years ago." She looks around expectantly and everyone claps. She smile and looks over to her left. A man with a mohawk, looks up at her. He sighs and stands us while she sits down.

"My name is Noah Puckerman. I'm twenty three and I'm suffering through PTSD" he sits down immediately after that, sinking into his seat.

Rachel looks over to the man beside him and let's out a small gasp. He was handsome, with floppy brown hair and muscles being shown in his arms even though it's covered by the oversized hospital gown. It was his eyes that really caught her attention. They shined an amber color. When it was his turn he lifted his lips to a half smile and her heart jumped. He stood up to reveal that he was tremendous. It was probably just her, she is a very short girl.

"Names, Finn Hudson and I'm twenty-three diagnosed with kidney cancer." He sits down and looks around. That's when they meet eyes. She couldn't stop staring, and it's not like he took his eyes away too.

Now she can tell the cancer is actually spreading to her brain, because it felt like they were the only ones in the room. Rachel isn't a dumb girl, she knows there are people talking about their conditions, and there are severely sick people here like her, but his eyes. His eyes bore into her's, and hers are boring right back into his. She knows that it's totally and incredibly dumb to believe that he might find her attractive. No, she probably has something on her face, and he just cant take his eyes away.

It was until they reached Blaine, that she took her eyes away from him. Blaine nervously stood and tapped his foot repeatedly, as if it will shake it all out. He looks down at her and she give him a small smile. He sighs and opens his mouth saying,

"My name is Blaine Anderson and I'm twenty-two years old. I have been diagnosed with ADHD since I was twelve years old." He looks down at Rachel again and she gives him a small nod. He sits down and continues tapping his foot and looking down at his hands.

She then realizes it was her turn, and the nerves started getting at her too. She gulped before standing up and saying, "My name is Rachel Barbra Berry I'm twenty-one years old and I have been diagnosed with leukemia since I was sixteen years old."

She sits back down, and they continue down the circle but she can still feel everyone's eyes on her. She took a piece of her hair and started twirling it around her finger. It's obvious now that her hair is a wig and not real at all. Its quite funny that the only thing she can think about is what people will think of her physical appearance. Thats only because Rachel already knows what people think about the cancer. 'Oh, Im so sorry', 'You can fight this', 'Don't let it control you'. Like they know anything about her condition. They don't have to throw up and slowly go bald, they don't have to wake up and automatically feel like they are going to die, they don't have to suffer through all the stares and pitiful looks people throw at her. So yes, all Rachel really cares about is her hair. She wanted to feel normal, it's kinda idiotic because she knew coming in to this that people would figure out some time in the hour that she has to spend here.

Rachel looks over at Finn, who is looking at the person speaking. He looks optimistic, like she used to be. He probably doesn't mind the stares and the glances. Probably was the star basketball player in high school, with all the girls flocking him. She had to look away from him, he would have been one of the boys that would throw slushies at her and throw her in the dumpster. He would egg her like Jesse St. James did right before she was diagnosed with leukemia. That was before she pulled the faint spell. Rachel looks over to Emma whats her name and tries to act like she's paying old Rachel Berry would probably still be gawking at him, staring at him unforgivingly with her big ole crazy eyes. The moment this was over that Rachel would have marched up to him and shake his hand. The old-

She has to stop thinking about that Rachel, it's honestly depressing her how pathetic she was. It's also very depressing how she lost that little spark that made her, her.

"Okay! That was great! Thank you for sharing Leslie!" She actually focus's on the red-head and finds that she is talking about the girl to her right who was blowing on a tissue. Everybody around the room is clapping so she starts clapping too. She kinda feels bad for Leslie, everybody is clapping at a probably very forlorn story she told, while she's crying her eyes out. The last thing she wants somebody to do is clap. Of course maybe Rachel's wrong and she told an uplifting story of how she fought some illness or event, so she would come off as a churl if she stopped clapping for the girl. " Now I want everybody to join hands and join me in prayer to our Lord" Emma looks at everybody expectantly. What is this lady thinking. She looks around the room and see's some baffled looks as well, there are even some offended ones.

Thats when Rachel finds herself raising her hand and Emma calling on her.

"Ms. No offense to you or to whatever religion you are in, but I think that would be highly impractical thing to do. Asking everybody to join hands and to pray, when you are not certain of what they believe in. I myself am Jewish and the last time I found myself praying was a year ago. Someone here might be offended by your insistence to pray to you're 'Lord'. Not that praying to your Lord is bad but making people who you don't know their beliefs do it too is unacceptable" Rachel looks around to see some nods agreeing with her, that a relief she wouldn't want to make a total fool of herself.

Emma blinks a few times, gaping like a fish before clearing her throat and saying, "I apologize. It sometimes go over my head that people don't believe… how about we just hold hands and pray to whatever or whoever you believe in. May be science, may be a God or two but lets just join in together."

Emma looks over at Rachel, and raises an eyebrow questioningly as she nods her head in response. They all hold hands and thats when Rachel realizes that she's sitting right next to dirty scary man. Thats karma for opening up her big mouth and speaking her mind. It was quite surprising to see the man smiling over at her and holding out his hand. She smile back, and look over to Blaine to see him shrugging his shoulders before grabbing her hand with his own. They stayed silent as Emma talked about how thankful and lucky they were to be alive right now. Rachel couldn't disagree with that, they told her she would be dead in six moons after they diagnosed her, and look at her now.

The rest of the session was just of Emma talking about this and that, Rachel wasn't really paying attention she was singing some of her favorite Broadway songs in her head. As soon as the session ended Rachel bounced off her seat and made her way towards the door. Blaine followed behind her and stopped her, before she reached the door.

"That was really amazing what you said to Ms. Pillsbury back there" So thats her last name, Rachel would probably forget it by the next session. "Why are you leaving so soon?"

"I have a blood test after this, and I wouldn't want to delay them. You know how the hospital is about being on schedule. I myself think its very important as well so I wouldn't want to be I'd rather wait for a nurse to escort me to the room out there." The lie slipped from Rachel's lips easily, and if she wasn't so used to lying it would have been surprising. Blaine nods his head in understanding and waves her goodbye.

When she exits the room she lets out a relieved sigh. It was too many people, too many confessions and words of regret. Looking over at the doors, there are guards in front of the exit doorways and the elevators. As she said before she hates the psychiatric ward. She steps forward to go over to the elevators when suddenly she gets pushed down. Instead of falling to her doom though, she is caught into these arms. She feels herself getting lifted up while she hears a masculine voice coming from above her.

"I'm so sorry. Are you alright?" Rachel looks up to those darn amber eyes she stared at earlier. The door to the room was open so he probably hit her with the door by accident.

"I'm fine. It was my fault I shouldn't walk in front of doors like that." Rachel stands up and looks over at the man standing before her.

"No its mine. Really. You're Rachel, right? What you said to Emma back there was pretty awesome." He gave her a half-smile and she wanted to disappear. The moment she wishes Jamie would show up unannounced she doesn't.

"Thats correct Rachel Berry. It is nice to know that people did not find my out burst irritating and annoying. And it really was my fault, Finn. Right?" She holds out her hand to shake while he grins and takes her hand in his. Her hand drowned in his, reminding her of how truly small she is.

"Finn Hudson. It wasn't annoying at all , it was the truth. I'm pretty sure she did mean well though."

Rachel slips her hand out of his when she realizes that they were still shaking hands. She claps them in front of before giving him a small smile. "I'm sure she did. I would bake her cookies as an apology, but this certainly isn't the place to find the things I would need."

"Yeah. I feel-"

"Hudson! Come on I don't got all day!"

She peeks over his shoulder to see the man with the mohawk tapping his foot in annoyance. Finn looks over to the man and rolls his eyes in annoyance before turning back to her.

"Sorry, thats my friend Puck. He isn't a very patient person as you can see." He chuckles before turning to 'Puck' and saying "I accidentally bumped into her making her fall."

Rachel feels as if she should introduce herself. She stops herself and vaguely remembers the mans name was Noah Puckerman. "Hello there, its nice to meet you. My names Rachel Berry, you are Noah Puckerman. Correct?"

She holds out her hand for him to shake as he looks at it skeptically. He reaches out and shakes it once before putting on a charming smile.

"Yeah my names Noah Puckerman, but I prefer to be called Puck. Though for you, you can call me anything you want." Rachel giggles as Finn goes over and hits him in the head.

Noah seemed like a player, a bad boy that broke plenty of hearts during high school. They were probably a big duo back then. They probably are still a big duo now, breaking girls heart as they passed through the motions.

"I would prefer to keep it with Noah. It was really nice to meet you both but I have an appointment I would like to keep," She smiles over at the two of them waving goodbye before turning around and walking towards the elevators.

"Bye Rachel," Finn called behind her.

When she turned around to face him, he waved his hand with that damm half smile. She just couldn't help but smile back at him.

* * *

She wiped her mouth as she stood up from her place on the bathroom floor. She just couldn't wait to get her hands on the mouthwash her fathers are buying her to get the wretched taste out of her mouth. Throwing up inside a toilet isn't one of her favorite activities if you can't tell. That was one of her least favorite parts of chemo, though the whole entire experience is not enjoyable. Rachel just couldn't wait until chemo would be over and she can go out. This was the longest she was checked in, they were giving her an aggressive dosage this time around and it was killing her.

Looking in the mirror she saw the sunken ghost that was left behind. She had bags under her eyes and her skin was the palest it could be. Her bones were peeking out from under skin and you could tell, especially in the fluorescent lights, how truly skinny she was. This sight that was a pain for even her to look at would make her fathers cry. She can not handle her fathers crying, it gets harder with time.

"Rachela! We are here with your mouthwash!" Her daddy Hiram called out from behind the door.

She sent them to get some the moment she felt the bile coming up her throat. It was painful seeing your daughter in this state, and she wants to take away as much as possible. Nobody should suffer like she is right now. Not her fathers, not anybody. The moment she opens the door, the gasps were heard and the look of terror was in their eyes.

"Oh Rachel! Our poor baby girl!" That was her dad, Leroy talking now. They both had their hands covering their mouths. They have never seen her like this, not with a glare on her face anyways.

"It's fine dads. Thank you for the mouthwash."

Rachel grabs it and heads towards the sink. She puts some in her mouth and starts rinsing out the taste of bile. She spits it out and still see's her dads looking sadly at her.

"Dad, daddy, please I really am alright. This is not the first time, probably is the hundredth actually." Hiram places his hand on her face sighing at the tiredness washing over it.

"It gets-"

"Why don't you go to bed, we'll watch Funny Girl. How does that sound?" Hiram interrupts his husband and leads Rachel to the bed.

She nods her head not wanting to fight and lays down. Thats all she wants to do. Sleep until everything is gone. Sleep instead of fighting and wanting, no yearning for a different life.

Sleep sounds much nicer.

* * *

 **I'm gonna try to write longer chapters from now on. Well I'll go up a thousand words each time until I feel that its enough.** **It's just I need time to think about where this is gonna go because it can have so many alternatives. Also I'm really sorry for anyone who feels uncomfortable with the whole God issue. I'm not a very religious person, and I know a lot of people who believe in nothing at all. Emma always seemed like a really religious person to me, if they let us get to know her a little better. I really do like her though, she's kinda awkward and weird like me. This is a Finchel story by the way. I have shipped them since the first episode. I just knew they were meant for each other no matter what. Even with Brody and Jesse and Quinn. It was a tragedy when Cory died, I remember I wasn't a Glee fan when he did but I saw his face everywhere and I felt so bad for him. And when I did watch the show I got crushed when "The** **Quarterback" happened.**

 **I will also try to incorporate Puck into this with the best of my abilities. I absolutely love him, he's always been hilarious for me. So has Kurt. And I do know that Rachel here isn't very Rachel like but just know that if you have been through all the things she has been through would you still be so** **hopeful. Leukemia is a very serious cancer and its very unlikely for someone to survive. She's been on the brink of death several times.**

 **Anyways until next time!**

 **Adios, Tannerinos!**


	3. Chapter 3 : I'll never Escape

**I do not own anything to do with Glee. Don't sue me.**

 **The chapter title is a lyric from the song Tears- Clean Bandit ft. Louisa Johnson**

 **The actual whole entire title name was I get the feeling I'll never escape, but it didn't all fit. So it's just I'll never escape.  
Enjoy!**

* * *

A few years ago when Rachel just figured out about her condition her fathers took her on a trip to New York City. It was right after her first aggressive chemo session and she was checked out of the hospital. Rachel wanted to be in New York just for a little bit, to make herself feel better and to know that all the pain will be worth it. The trip was wonderful, they took her to a show , Les Mis, and they went to all five boroughs. When they visited Central Park she sat down next to this small pond and watched the ducks swim, her fathers were out getting her some peanuts. It was there when she saw the smallest duck of them all get its foot tangled in some branches at the edge of the pond. All the other ducks continued and there was the runt struggling to break free.

She stood up and untangled the small thing from the branch. It gave the smallest of quacks and went swimming along to catch up with the others. She noticed how persistent that little duck was, it just needed a little help from somebody to get back up. He was mostly out anyways, but she knows if she left him he'd probably be stuck there. It's kinda funny how she was like his prince charming, or well princess. That was the moment she swore she would fight the cancer, it was just a branch catching her, but she can get out. With or without somebody to help her.

Now she's still struggling and all the people are passing by not helping her. She doesn't mind, not really. Even though her "branch" is sucking away at her life, leaving her tired and restless. If there's one thing that still hasn't been eaten by Rachel's life sucking cancer it's her "Can't go down without a fight" attitude. Hopefully it won't be whisked away from her, maybe if it does a prince can come and rescue her. But that's stupid, nobody has laid eyes on her since her massive faint spell in sophomore year.

Now that was a sight to see, _the_ Rachel Berry falling down to the ground after performing with her Glee Club in front of the whole school during an assembly. She was always the one pushing people to their limit, to get them to perform with the best of their abilities. It figures that she'd go down because of her own doing.

That's whats going on through her mind while walking past her old high school. She was released a week ago, but here she is walking back towards it. It was kind of lucky that the hospital was only two blocks away from the school. Her parents sure know how to pick the right school. Yes they bullied her constantly and threw slushies at her face for no apparent reason, but at least it was near a hospital. She was only walking past it because that was the nearest stop to the hospital she can get from the bus.

She was only going to the prison because of Kurt, then therapy. Therapy is something that she does not enjoy at all. This will be her third time going and she has to share a story. And knowing Emma, she will pick on her first because she never says anything during the meetings, while everyone else has shared something. Kurt finds the whole situation hilarious, that is not very amusing. She cant remember if Carol (the woman dating Burt) was meeting Kurt today, so she kinda has to wing it. Kurt told her that he wouldn't mind if she visited while Carole was because Rachel was his best friend.

She reached the hospital, and smoothed down her sundress and hair. After getting a visitors sticker, she goes up to the cardio floor where Kurt was admitted into. He can't leave the hospital, his heart to weak and in critical condition. When she reached the room she knocked before going in. When she entered, Burt was next to a small woman around her forties. She looks over to her left and see's Finn out of all people leaning against the wall. They turn towards her with a surprised expression.

"Rachel! Carole this is my best diva Rachel Berry," Kurt beckons her over to them, and she slowly goes over. "Rachel, this is Carole Hudson and her son Finn,"

Rachel goes over and shakes hands with Carole giving her a small smile. Burt pats her shoulder and greets her with a nod. She always liked Burt, he was like the fun uncle.

"It's nice to meet you Rachel. Finn come over and say hello." Carole gives her a smile and looks over to Finn who was already coming over.

"Hey Rachel,"

"Hi Finn," Carole, Burt, and Kurt look curiously at the two who were smiling at each other. Rachel turned back to them and said, "We go to group therapy together,"

They all nod and turn back to Kurt who claps his hands and smiles over at them.

"Rachel, come over did you bring a magazine?" She nods and pulls out a Peoples magazine and some old Vogue issue from a few years back from her bag. He grins and puts it down by his bedside table.

"Nice to know, that I am so loved," She sticks her tongue out at Kurt.

"Oh hush now Rachel, you know I love you. Even when you wear atrocious things like those terrible animal sweaters that are making my heart weaker by the second." He looks over to Carole and smiles, "I love fashion, the moment I get my new heart, I'm going to NYADA and start studying it. These hospital gowns are turning me blind with their ugliness,"

Everyone laughs and Rachel goes back towards the door when everyone stops.

"I'm sorry for intruding. I'll come back after therapy and we'll talk. It was very nice to meet you " Rachel smiles and waves goodbye to the group and opens the door.

"I'm gonna go with Rachel, it was nice to meet you Kurt, Burt." Finn follows behind her after kissing his mothers cheek goodbye.

They leave the room silently and walk quietly toward the elevators. Rachel looks up to Finn to find him already looking down at her. He gives her a smile, which she returns back to him.

"So you are Kurt's best friend. Interesting" She looks over to him and nods.

"And you are Carole's son. Interesting indeed. You know you could have stayed back there and get to know Kurt and Burt better." He shrugs and steps inside the elevator with her.

"Yeah, I guess. It's just, it's kinda weird to see my mom dating. She has always been single, and now she is dating this guy with a son that's sick like me. And she really likes him, a lot so it's not like its a fling or anything." He looks over at her, before rubbing the back of his neck and said bashfully, "Sorry, I shouldn't have let that all out on you."

It was cute how he was mumbling like that. He looked up and gave her a shy look and it made her heart skip. It was one of the most adorable things she has seen. Giggling she responds,

"It's fine. You don't have to worry. I get what you are talking about." She puts his hand on his shoulder before continuing , "It's scary, having to share her now. She was always just your mom and now you are sharing her with a man and his son. Its totally reasonable that you feel like this. They are good people if you get to know them."

He nods and steps out of the lift with her. It wasn't until they reached the room and Rachel worrying she said the wrong thing, was when Finn spoke again.

"Thank you,"

"Your Welcome,"

* * *

"Let's see here… Rachel! How about you start us off today!"

She knew it! Of course Emma would choose her to start off the story session. Rachel looks over to Blaine helplessly and he just shrugs his shoulders. She stands up and dusts off her dress.

"So does it have to do with our condition or …"

"No! Rachel it can be about anything at all,"

Rachel would rather have these people know about her cancer than the slim memories that are actually pleasant. She clears her throat and begins,

"Well I was sixteen years old when I was first diagnosed and in the middle of my sophomore year. I didn't know that there was anything wrong at all until I started losing my appetite. The thought of food disgusted me, it made me want to vomit."

She had to pause an take a breath. Looking up she saw everybody eyes staring intently at her.

" My fathers believed I was starving myself because of body images and etcetera. They believed my boyfriend at the time was pressuring me to look prettier. I ate in smaller portions and started getting tired more easily. It was after my boyfriend dumped me in the form of eggs was when I started to crack."

Rachel had to stop and scoff ,"I give him props, having him and his friends throw eggs at me was very creative."

Looking up she saw sad expressions on their faces, except for Finn who looked like he was about to pop.

"Two days later, my Glee Club was performing at this assembly in front of the whole school, and in the middle of the song I fainted. Later they told me in this hospital that I had cancer and they put me on a feeding tube. They said I only had six months to live, but look at me now nearly six years later and still breathing"

People clapped as she sat back down in her seat. Blaine patted her shoulder and gave her a sad smile. Emma looked sadly at her before speaking up,

"Thank you, Rachel. Now who would like to go next?"

Finn's hand goes up, but he is looking directly at Rachel. She nods her head towards him, which he replies with a twitch of his lips. Emma calls on him and he stands up and clears his throat.

" I was diagnosed a few months ago. It was when I was playing a football game that I fainted and was rushed to the hospital. The fact that it was only a small game meant that something was wrong. My then girlfriend, Quinn was so worried about her future that she kinda forgot about my condition. When they said I had kidney cancer Quinn bolted, left me alone in the hospital without anybody. She couldn't be the girl with sick boyfriend who wouldn't make her famous."

He took a deep breath, and looked up at her. She nodded her head, encouraging him to continue.

"She came back two months later telling me that she was pregnant. And I, believed her when she said it was mine. Figures she realized that my grandma left me with a fortune to pay the medical bill, and wanted to go and take it. She faked the pregnancy." He twisted and pulled at his hands, looking up finally smiling ,"I'm glad though that she's gone. If she wasn't I'd be more focus on fake baby Drizzle, than what I really needed to focus on. Me."

"I am now stronger than ever. I became more independent. Really that made me better."

Rachel clapped, though she felt a fury build up inside her. Its twisted and evil, to tell a man who was dying of a serious illness that she was pregnant just so she can marry him and take all his inheritance money. That was something unfathomable to her, unexplainable. When he looked over at her she smiled, for his bravery. She can not imagine the betrayal and hurt he felt because of this Quinn girl.

They continued around the room after that, there were funny stories and sad ones. Rachel tried to pay the most attention, but her mind wandered. They were not able to get to Blaine or Noah and a few others this session. They would go next time.

She stood up and walked out the door after saying goodbye to Blaine. The elevators were occupied so she waited next to them. She heard voices coming from behind her and when she looked it was Noah and Finn walking towards her. Rachel turned back and stared at the closed doors as Finn and Noah stand next to her.

"Thank God that session is finally over. No way am I going to say any fucking story about _my_ life." That was Noah voice creeping from beside her.

"Hey Rach." Finn was smiling beside her, and she politely smiled back towards him.

"Oh! You're the chick Finn knocked over, the other day. You know your ex was a douche." Rachel raises her eyebrows but nods her head in agreement. Noah looks her over once and says, "You're sneaky hot, you couldn't see shit in that hospital gown. I approve."

"Umm, thank you? Though you put it very crudely, you did say that I was physically attractive and I am very flattered."

Noah has a confused expression, before being replaced with a charming smile. He snickers a little bit, as the elevator doors open. They all step in and press their respective buttons and wait for the doors to close.

"You're for real? I heard you mention that you were Jewish in the first meeting. I am too. We can make amazing Hot Jewish babies." Rachel starts coughing, as Finn gives Puck a glare.

"Though I am flattered once again I have no intentions in making any 'Hot Jewish babies' any time soon." Rachel answered. She looks over to Finn with wide eyes, he mouths back to her 'Im Sorry'

"Look if you want to have any fun once and a while, call me up."

With that the elevator doors opened to Noah floor and he stepped out, not before grabbing her hand and kissing it. He smirks over at her and steps out.

"Nice to meet you, princess. Remember the Puckster can help with _anything_."

The elevators close and silence fills the elevator. That was when Rachel started to laugh and by laughing she means cackling. Finn soon joins in, they just continue laughing until they reach Kurt's floor. She steps out and tension fills the space between them. They've stopped laughing and just stare into the others eyes intently. It was Rachel who opened her mouth first.

"I'm sorry about Quinn. You didn't deserve the horrid way she treated you. Nobody does." Finn gives her a sad smile before speaking up himself.

"It's no big deal. I'm happier and better now. Well not better, I have cancer but… you know what I mean." He groans and hits his forehead causing Rachel to giggle. He looks up with an anger taking over his face, " What your ex did was terrible. What was his name?"

"Jesse St. James, how does that-"

"More like Jesse St. Jackass. Nobody deserves to be treated like that." He mimics her words.

They stay in silence for just a beat. Rachel came up and wrapped her arms around him. It took him a second but he responded, hugging her tightly. They stay like that for what seems like forever. Rachel could feel sparks flying off them, the way they touched, the way they held each other. It was like she found her lifeline, her rope, and she's breaking free. It wasn't until the elevator doors hit their shoulder when they realized they were blocking the doorway. Rachel looks up towards Finns face to see him staring down at her. She reaches up on her tip-toes and brings his neck down with her hands to peck his cheek. She goes up to his ear and whispers "Thank You" before pulling away.

She steps back towards the hospital, and he steps back into the elevator; she watches the doors close and it brings her back into reality. Rachel knew that she liked hugging Finn, a lot. That was bad, she couldn't allow herself to get close to him. It would hurt to much. No more Finn interactions, no more hugs and pecks, no more growing closer together.

Rachel decides that she will only be polite with Finn even though it will pain her to step back, she knows stepping closer would hurt more.

* * *

 **So instead of writing more, I wrote less I guess. I wanted to give a little New Years treat. I won't be posting anything next week and won't be until the following I don't know when so I wanted to give a little something something. Hope the content makes up for it. Also I'm writing on the second to last day of this year and I had a party tomorrow so I couldn't really give you more. You get some Rachel, Finn, and Puck interaction. And some Finn and Rachel action [insert smirk face]. I will jump in deeper into the whole Quinn debacle, that ain't the whole story. I hope I did a good Puck and Kurt. Please Review!**

 **Happy New Years, Tannerinos!**


	4. Chapter 4: Anything can happen

**And I'm back! So sorry for the wait! Glee isn't mine, none of the characters are mine.**

 **All of them belong to Ryan Murphy and all those other beautiful people who made Glee!**

 **Enjoy!**

* * *

The jazzy music surrounded her, as she sat down at a small table in the corner of the café. Rachel was drowning, all she does now is go to the hospital or go home. It's suffocating her slowly but surely, so when her fathers gave her the keys to their car after they left to a business trip in Toledo she decided to go to a small local café. Though she loves Barbra very much, even she gets a bit sick of seeing her face everyday just in different scenarios everyday. The cafe, Mocha Joe, was petite and played nice, relaxing music. Well, most café's play nice, relaxing music but you get her point.

Even there sitting down sipping her chai tea and nibbling the blueberry muffin(she gave up the vegan and vegetarian lifestyle a long time ago), she still is quite sad. What she needs is a bit of company, and she can go visit Kurt at the hospital but that will make her become sadder so the purpose would be mute. There's also Tina, one of her only friends from high school that still kept in touch with her. Though Tina is trying to spend as much time with Mike, her boyfriend, as mush as she can for he is leaving to Nevada for a position at this very major dance league.

These are the moments where Rachel sometimes regrets her strive for greatness, and not really trying to gain friends. All of that didn't matter when she knew that she would rather be at the top of the entertainment business, and winning Tony's.

It was impossible to go walking around the park, she would tire out after fifteen minutes, one of the downfalls of being diagnosed with leukemia, well any cancer really. It takes the energy out of her, walking great distances. Chemo has been helping controlling it and trying to get her back on track, but chemo itself drains out her energy as well. She used to exercise every morning on her elliptical bike, she was very fit. Now her bones poke out of her skin and she can't even run.

Maybe if she-

" Hey Rachel!" standing right there was Blaine Anderson with a bagel in one hand. He sat down across from her and took a bite from his bagel.

"Blaine! I didn't know you go to café's? Wouldn't it just make you more jumpy?"

He chuckled out, "Thats only if I drink coffee. A little bit of bagel and cream cheese wouldn't hurt anybody," he took a sip of water, tapping his fingers against the table, " Unless it contains caffeine, which I don't think it does. Why are _you_ at a café?"

"The house was duller than a two hour lecture on the color beige. The café seemed like a better option." He nodded and took another bite of his bagel.

She sat quietly as he started talking about his brother. He started looking around spying for him, as he is somewhere about the small place.

"He's tall with blue eyes and-aren't those guys in our therapy group?"

Turning around she saw Finn and Noah entering the building. Finn immediately noticed her and smiled in greeting while he walked over to the line by the cashier. Noah skips the whole entire line and starts flirting with the cashier, whose face turns brighter than a tomato. When Finn looks over at her and rolls his eyes pointing at him, Rachel smiles politely and turns back to Blaine who continued looking for his brother.

"Ah! There he is!" A man in a button down shirt and slacks starts walking over. Rachel gasps and leans over to Blaine whispering harshly

"You never told me your brother was Cooper Anderson! He's been in two major box office films!"

" It's kinda annoying have a movie star for a big brother. Don't fan girl,"

"I won't! I'm not a fan I just know he's famous. You don't have to like Justin Bieber's music to know who he is. Right?"

"My brother is not as popular as Justin-Hey Coop!"

She looks up and see's the movie star give her an award winning smile. She waved her hand and he looked back over to Blaine who was bouncing in his seat.

"Blainey! Kid you gotta stop leaving me behind, you're way too fast." He walks over and messes up Blaine's gelled hair, making him gasp and slap his hands.

"Easy there Sprout! Look I gotta go meet up Lisa at her house, if you get what I'm getting at." He smirks over at Blaine before putting his attention on Rachel, " Hello there,"

He grabs her hand and kisses it softly before letting it down slowly, " Names Cooper Anderson, you may have seen me in a few films. You wouldn't mind dropping off Blainey here to the house would ya? For such a pretty lady I wonder why you're hanging out with him,"

"I wouldn't mind dropping him off. And Blaine here is a very nice man, unlike you who seems like a jerk, flirting with me when you have a girl waiting for you. It was very nice to meet you." With that Rachel turns back to Blaine who gives her a grin. Cooper huffs and walks away while saying,

"Whatever, Blaine don't wait up for me tonight."

"No offense but your brother is-"

"A jerk, I know. Thanks for defending me, most girls would just blush and start flirting with him. Do you think this place takes recommendation for music?"

She shrugs and looks over towards the line. Finn was paying for his food and Noah was standing next to him annoyed. Turning back to Blaine, she finds him staring at a figure behind her. She turns and see's a man putting some sugar into his coffee, a quite attractive man.

"Go up and say hi to him." He looks at her and blushes shaking his head.

"I-No I'll stay here, safe." She rolls his eyes and kicks him from under the table.

"Ow! That hurt! For such a small girl you can-"

"Hey, Rachel, you don't mind if we sit here?" Finn says already sitting down next to her right. Noah sits down to her left and smirks over to her.

"Hey! It's my hot jewish princess." He nods over to her before starting on Finn "This place is for hippies and shit man. Bad asses like me go to bars."

"In the morning? The only people who go to bars at this hour are alcoholics and men whose wives kicked them out. Also the pathetic ones who let their lives go down the drain and refuse to pick it up, Noah" He huffs and chugs down a bit of coffee, while Finn and Blaine laugh.

"Its Puck, have you ever been to a bar? Those places are fun, and filled with busty chicks who are missing a bit of the Puckerone in their lives."

Rachel simply rolls her eyes "They aren't going to be there at 10 a.m. in the morning,"

"A man can try"

"More like a hormonal teenager let loose with condoms and without supervision" Finn pipes up from his seat. Puck punches his arm and grumbles in his seat.

Rachel sighs and picks at her muffin. The tea was already all gone, and figuring that Noah is here she will need another one. She goes over to the trashcan and throws in the empty cup and stands in line, not having the energy to banter with him. Blaine slides in next to her and looks around the room examining each person for a few seconds, but lingering on the man he was staring at once before.

"You shouldn't drink so much caffeine." Blaine says absentmindedly

"Oh don't be a party pooper. I'm living as much as I can. Besides you're not really interested in that, are you?" She looks over to see him blushing, "Go over to the guy over there, you seem interested" from the corner of her eye she can see him sneaking glances at her exuberant friend, "and from the looks of it, he likes you too"

"All right, I'll go, just for you though."

"Mhmm"

The way the man almost sprints to him before calming himself and walking over says otherwise. The aroma of coffee enters her nostrils as she gets closer and closer, and it's just making her crave it. Maybe a bit of some more powerful caffeine wont hurt. Once reaching the line she places her order and waits, impatiently, for the woman to start making it. Ever since Noah flirted with her, the woman has been staring over at him since he has left. When Rachel turns around and see's Puck winking at the cashier, she glares at him. He notices her and turns back to his sandwich quickly.

"Ma'am its $2.50." Rachel hands her the money in exchange for her drink. She turns around and looks over to see Blaine chatting with handsome mysterious man. Thats when she decided to go back to the table.

"So I was telling the chick "The Puckster isn't against anything" and _thats_ when she pinned me against the wall and she pressed her humongous-"

"Noah, I would rather you not talk about your sexual escapades when I'm in hearing distance."

He rolls his eyes and chumps his sandwich and speaks

"Babe, my 'sexual escapades' are probably about the best thing you will ever hear in your life. Also stop calling me Noah, it's not bad ass, not worthy to be associated with the Guns." He turns to Finn and holds his hands in front of him representing the woman breast "They are _legendary_! Back me up Finn-O"

He shrugged and said , "They're okay. I'd rather be talking about-"

"There you go! Now let me finish"

He continued on about the poor thing, and Rachel felt like throwing up just by his descriptions. Finn looked like he was in another world, so Rachel decided to do the same. She might be able to get out of it, leaving the café but that would mean ruining Blaine's chances with the mystery man. So she sat through it.

"I mean her skills were… out of this world. And her jugs, they were the largest I have ever seen! Not like they have competition, with all I see nowadays are Rachel's bee stings."

"Hey! My breast may not be jugs or anything, but at least they wont be down by the floor when I'm fifty." She huffs and crosses her arms, pursing her lips and lowering her eyes down to the table.

"Puck honestly what's up with you today," Finn glares over at him, " Rachel is perfect just the way she is, she is more of a woman than all of your skanks,"

She looks up at him in surprise, and see's him smiling at her. She smiles back and looks down putting hair behind her ear. Puck huffs and turns over and stares at Rachel.

"Sorry babe, you're boobs are small and perky and you have a nice ass," he turns back while Rachel just laughs. She knows he means well.

"Can I just say though they were bigger than my hands,"

"Puck!"

This is when Finn slaps his head. Puck rubs it and glares over at the man and then at Rachel who was laughing behind her hand. These men were probably the most childish people she has ever encountered. She loves it though, way too much for her to actually admit. It helps that they are more attractive to her than Ryan Gosling. Well, Finn is way more her type, she couldn't handle a Noah for more time than necessary. Everything will stay strictly platonic, nothing will ever pass that area. No matter how Finn's eyes sparkled when he laughed, how she wants to run her hands through his hair, or how his smile made her feel things she's never felt before. She wanted to tell him everything, her dreams, her fears.

It was a dejected Blaine that stopped her from going deeper, though she was already under water. His dejected expression, lit a fury within her. What did this jerk do to him?

"What happened?" asked Noah beating her.

"Nothing, everything was fine until he brought up my jittering, when I told him he immediately backed off," He rubs his head and shrugs, "I'm used to it,"

"You shouldn't be! Where is this jerk? I'll make him go running and leave him jittering!" Rachel stands up and looks around the room.

Blaine touches her hand and shakes his head. Looking down at his pleading eyes makes her sit back down. They sit in silence and it's now that she wishes for Puck to tell his insanely vulgar stories.

"I think we should go, I'm getting tired anyway," Rachel stands up and nods her head towards the door.

Finn and Puck wish her goodbye as her and Blaine begin to walk away.

Before leaving the café she catches eyes with the man who Blaine flirted with. It's not her fault her hand so happens to raise itself and stick the middle finger in his general area. She takes pride in the guffaws she hears coming from Noah and Finn before walking out.

* * *

Rachel does not take pride of the fact that the minute she comes home, she collapses on the couch and groans in the most inhumane way possible. Blaine ,who didn't want to come home yet, stands there awkwardly rubbing smooth circles on her back. The last Barbra movie that was in the DVR started to play when he put on the TV. It scared him half to death when Barbra's voice suddenly comes on belting the last note to "My Man". He jumped up and then curled in a ball, calming his breath. Rachel who was laughing felt bad and started to rub circles on _his_ back. That was when Santana came in.

Santana is Rachel's annoying and vulgar cousin who comes over when her dad's leave the city for a trip. Though Rachel doesn't really mind Santana, sometimes even enjoying her company, there are moments where she can push to far. So when Santana comes in with a blonde hooked on her lips heading towards her room, it ticked Rachel off.

"Really Santana, you're going to do it in _my_ room?" Santana stops kissing the blonde woman and stands with her hands on her hips.

"Look Stubby, your room is going to be christened with glory. So when you finally put it to good use it will be blessed by the goddess herself." Santana smirks at Rachel's flushed look.

"Santana I do not need you to be _blessing_ or _christening_ my room. Its perfect as it is."

"Ugh your right. I wouldn't want to wank out in there. It has more stuffed animals than the amount Sandy Ryerson has owned his whole life!" Santana plops on the couch bringing the blonde down with her, "Whose the midget?"

"Santana!"

Rachel's looks on with wide eyes and whispers apologizes to Blaine who brushes it off.

"I'm Blaine Anderson, Rachel's friend," He sticks out his quivering hand as Santana shakes it.

"You're one of her freaky medical friends right? Its cool I already met Lady Elaine Fairchilde, with such a high pitched voice that can send dogs running in his direction. Even a deaf-" Rachel shrieks again as Blaine squints on. The blonde on Santana's lap tilts her head and asks,

"Wait your friends with the puppet? Can I meet the her Sani?"

She looks over to Santana who shakes her head with a giggle, "No silly, Lady Elaine is a human. His real name is Kurt, but he's a fragile little thing isn't that right Yentl?"

Rolling her eyes, Rachel stands up and grabs a cup of water, needing something to cool off her flushed cheeks. It was obvious she was uncomfortable, like she usually is around Santana.

"Berry I'd like for you to meet my girlfriend Brittany, Brits meet RuPaul!"

Brittany walks over to Rachel and shakes her hand, giving her a warm but dazed off smile. Through the whole encounter the girl always seemed to be in another land. Though the fact that she wasn't as crass and rude as Santana's other girlfriends made Rachel warm up to her. Brittany's innocent nature made Rachel trust her.

"Were you named after a strawberry?" Brittany asked with a hopeful looks on her face.

Rachel shakes her head and smiles, "No my first name is Rachel and my last name is Berry. I was named after Rachel Green from Friends the TV show."

The blonde looked disappointed yet still gave her a bright smile anyway. The girl walked back over to Santana and plopped down on her lap as Santana switched the TV back to regular mainstream TV. Blaine sits awkwardly on the sofa as the girls start to make out with the background noise of a man groaning in pain from Grey's Anatomy.

"Can you guys stop! I love this show," Rachel walks as quickly as she can to the sofa and sits by to watch it.

"Shouldn't you hate a hospital show?" Blaine asks as Owen Hunt cuts into the man's chest.

"Yeah, but who can resist McSteamy and McDreamy? If our hospital was like Seattle Grace I'd probably be cured from cancer with those hot looks. Plus watching the doctors drama would be way more entertaining than the nurse bringing in jello every once in a while" Rachel responds watching intently the screen, "The show did start going downward ever since-"

"Stop it Berry! I'm only on season 3!" Santana exclaims from under Brittany.

Before she can respond, Rachel's phone begins to ring. She grabs it and smiles when she see's its from Kurt.

"Hey Kurt! How's Nurse Freeman? She did anything to offend the fashion gods?"

"Rachel, it's Burt," Her heart stops, Burt never calls and would certainly never call from Kurt phone.

"Is everything okay ?" Her hands shakes as Santana stops and turns to her. She hears crying coming from the other end, "Mr. Hummel?!"

"They found a match. He's getting a heart!"

Rachel screams and jumps on the couch laughing with tears coming down her eyes. "He got a heart!" Santana jumps up and hugs her as Brittany and Blaine look on confusion.

After wishing Burt farewell, Rachel goes over and grabs Blaine's and Brittany's hands and drags them out the door with Santana following suit. They run to the car and get inside making sure everyone is properly situated before driving off the street.

* * *

 **And that's it! I'm so sorry that this took forever to come out. I already written half of it when the first part of "set this spark into a flame" came out. With that story it all started to rush out, and I knew if I did not write it, it would have went away. So now I'm taking a break from that story and renewing this. Happy New Years guys! Hope you enjoyed!**

 **Adios Tannerinos!**


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